The more we judge, the less we love.”  – Nalini Dutta

Long years of life have taught me a lot of things, one being, how to not see people through the lens of my life and my situation.How to stop being so miser in accepting different behaviors than my own. How to stop being so Judgemental.

Growing up all these years, we learn what is right or wrong too early. We associate good and bad behaviors in things people do and thus assume, how these people will be in nature and occupation. These notions only grow stronger with the mindset that sets in, in our coping with western- Indian society, which is still conservative at heart.

I have judged people for smoking, drinking, even having multiple flings or relationships and somewhere tagged them as bad. I have grown up like this and would stop talking to anyone who I thought did not act like my father who never smokes or drinks. He would always come home from work on time and gave us all his attention and love. But the thing is the list does not end here, I never

I never realised I am becoming a person who will not be friendly and will be up tight. For me, every person I met was categorized good, bad, cunning, flirt, bad mouthed and what not.  This, however, does not mean I never accepted anyone, I did, but only my close friends. I had a different view of them, I was more open to their lives and did not judge them as harshly for things I judged others. I realised it much later, that because we people certain people and are close them, we do not judge them. We accept them for who they are and thus the relationship flourishes. But why is this acceptance difficult for everyone in general. Only because of lack of love.

It’s not that I have been judged, I have been on numerous occasions for being ambitious which is a crime being a woman and at times for various others things. #BeingJudgemental, as I see it, is a malady that makes us intolerant of how others are. When we keep on judging, we hold ourselves from loving.

The problem rampant today is that we have a voice, but we do not use it constructively. We Judge celebrities, common man, politicians and have endless debates over someone’s opinion. At times forcing people to quit social platforms. In all this mad race and having once been a part of it, I feel to grow a society of love and respect, the only thing that is required is “Stop being judgemental” and “Start acceptance” of people and spread love and respect.  

No matter if they are different than you, they are too a human made out of the same flesh as you.   

~ Nalini  Dutta

 

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